A Nurse Helena Vid- And a Happy and Peacful New Year to All

Hi once again folks for one more time, certainly the last for 2015 and possibly for some time, depending on my desktop computer’s reaction to its upcoming surgery – the kitchen table awaits! 

I had been intending to operate yesterday but got distracted by various other commitments, for which I’m now glad - and luckily I had left the computer running - because thanks to contributor, ‘Candii’, who has clearly been picking through the Internet with a fine toothed comb, I can now share with you the second part of that Nurse Helena video I posted some time back.   

For those of you who have yet to view the first part or would like reminding I have included the first part again here also (above), to save you the bother of searching the archive - part two follows on below…ENJOY!!!  As I've said before, the imagery at least (even if not the actual storyline) in the Nurse Helena material (especially the 'stills' - of which I have built up quite a collection now, thanks in no little part to the self same 'Candii') is the closest I have ever come across (other than the stuff I have created myself for my own satisfaction, some of which I have shared with you in the past) to that I attempt to evoke in my writing, particularly the INSTITUTIONALISED series. 

I’m now shutting down this computer for the last time in it’s present configuration for repairs, but can still read and respond to emails, comments etc from my smart phone.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!

At The Stroke of a Pen: From Beach Belle To Inmate!

With my desktop computer on its last legs (I left it running all over Christmas for fear it would not boot up again once turned off) I thought I'd do one more thing before it goes under the knife, so to speak.  I've been away for Christmas (nowhere exotic - insufficient funds - just a lady friend's place) but am back home for a couple of days leading up to New Years Eve and with the kids still away at their Gran's and the flat to myself (more importantly, the kitchen table as a makeshift theatre) now would seem the perfect time to perform the necessary surgery.  And I've determined tomorrow shall be the red letter day - so wish me luck!

So here is the Garth Toyntanen interpretation of (take on) one of Bobby Venice’s Deviant Art ‘rejuvination’ pics (Google Bobby Venice and Deviant Art), this interpretation inspired by one of my storylines.  To be honest this is an unfinished work and is waiting for annotation and / or speech bubble but I thought I’d put it out now since my computer could fail at any moment.  It could do with a little refinement here and there too, for example it is a little ragged and there is quite a lot of fringing around some of the elements which ordinarily I'd deal with - but as I say, I'm pushing my luck already as it is!  I'll return to it at a later date once my computer issues have been sorted - AND get that new book out I have been harping on about for so long, 

 It brings together several elements you will have seen before, such as the rubber or polythene (you decide) mental patient dress, the cane and commode stool.  The background (beds, nurse-station desk ect) is from something created for me long ago by Angela Fox for an illustrated version of my third book: INSTITUTIONALISED 3: A CONTINUUM OF DISCIPLINE.

So there you have it  - possibly the last thing you'll hear from me for a while if tomorrow's surgery doesn't go well!

A belated Merry Christmas to you all, and best wishes for a happy and lucky new year!  Hears hoping 2016 works for you, whatever your hopes and desires!  For myself, having passed my level 3 personal trainer qualification, my hope is to quickly build up a stable of clients; specialising in the 'older athelete' with my 'unique selling point' being that as an 'older athlete' myself I'm not asking anyone to do or achieve anything I can't myself; after all, a twenty-something gym god can be a little intimidating if not downright demotivating after a certain age.  Well, that's my belief anyway!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Seen But Not Heard: The Shock Collar

This one is part photo manip by yours truly, Garth Toyntanen, based on - and inspired by - the plot of one of my unfinished upcoming books, and part 3D computer generated art produced by someone well known in the area but who doesn’t particularly want to be identified with my interpretation.

I actually created this some time back, but held back on publishing it until I'd asked permission, and then until I got around to removing the original signature from the computer generated element...  And then I forgot about it altogether - until now.  But I've not been able to do any writing today anyway (see below) and had reason to check thorough my files and folders (also see below), so when I blundered into it again I thought I might as well get it done, finished and 'out there'.  

I may be away a while, incidentally.  My RAID 0 hard drive system (2 X 10,000 RPM Raptors) is showing signs of failing; I’ve backed up and created a cloned drive to restore from, and I’m all set to swap over to a brace of SSDs (larger) - but once I switch off, I doubt it’ll reboot again until the hard drive change-over is complete.  

And It won't be as easy as it sounds coz I'll probably have to run the new drives in RAID 0 too (which is not RAID at all of course - as I've said before), since otherwise I'll not have sufficient storage space, or I'll have to host Windows on one disc and the data files on the over.  But whatever happens - at least I've everything backed up one way or the other.  

The funny thing is; only a couple of weeks ago I was in email correspondence with somebody who'd just had a fatal computer crash.  It made me check my own preparations in that regard - and of course, need I say, it turned out my last backup was way back in June 2014!!!  So when it took circa 12 boot attempts this morning, had the worst come to the worst, the majority of the important stuff was already backed up...  Oh well...sigh!... here goes...

PS: Seen the comments!  Will get back to you from my phone if I can't get this thing up and running again in a timely fashion.

Admission Procedures: Further Down the Line

She's been detained - now let's KEEP her detained!  

 (By the way - let me know whether - or not - you like these photo manip thingys I've been creating; personally I prefer the term 'photo montage art')

So… She’s blundered into this.  Perhaps lured by easy money – a clinical trial; OK it’s residential; OK, it’ll use up all summer, that long break before moving on, going on to university, perhaps getting a job, going her own way; but SO much money, SO much independence at the end of it, just for sitting around, being looked after, taking a few psychological tests now and then; what could POSSIBLY go wrong?

On the other hand perhaps she has been persuaded by other means, perhaps through a skilfully built scaffold of rapport and trust, allowing herself to be guided by some persuasive individual, superficially on her side or even apparently devoid of any connection whatsoever with the grasping stepmother, overbearing legal guardian or other nemesis she has been so keen to distance herself from… 

But appearances can be deceptive!

Or perhaps her independent headstrong spirit has already been slowly eroded over time in a stepwise fashion through psychological manipulation and the sheer power of will of her guardian to the point at which she has just simply been told she is to spend time ‘in care’ in a ‘rest home’ while her guardian takes a short cruise…”…just a few weeks, dear…”.

Either way, she’s been ‘put away’. But she’s committed no crime; there’s no evidence (or little evidence) of reduced mental capacity or her possessing insufficient mental competency to govern her own affairs…  She’s temporarily under control, right where you want her  - albeit relatively short-term.  Now the question becomes one of how to KEEP her that way, over the mid to longer-terms?  So - how would YOU go about it? (Come on - let's have some feedback! There used to be MASSIVE discourses on such matters back in the day in the Reader's Letters pages of those old spanking mags)  

Well, of course the first of these scenarios was the premise behind the INSTITUTIONALISED trilogy – but it still interests me, despite the fact that my latest opens in an entirely different way. 

Actually I’m still struggling with how to put together an opening section for the new book – I’m dedicating the remainder of today to it; after this post I’m doing nothing else. 

I want to be able to make clear to the reader at the outset that the direction is going to be VERY different from other author’s tales of domination and corporal punishment and that all manner of different and surprising themes (not to mention twists and turns) will be explored in upcoming parts / chapters (it has always been planned / conceived as a sort of serialised multi-part thing).  But at the same time I’m trying to adhere to a more linear storytelling style than my earlier stuff and minimise all that shifting back and forth between the present and the back-story which a few of you have in the past described as ‘Kafkaesque’ (though one or two folk have said THAT is what they liked about the early stuff).

Post Script: Two days ago I finally received a confirmation letter saying I’ve satisfied the criteria to be qualified as a gym instructor and personal trainer.  But even THAT has come with a proviso that “it could be several months” before I receive my certificate!  Several MONTHS!!!  It says the letter itself will suffice in the mean time to satisfy insurers.  But what it DOESN’T say, explicitly, is if it will be accepted by REPs (the Register of Exercise Professionals) without the certificate itself having been issued, without inclusion on which one cannot operate officially as a personal trainer here in the UK.  So I have issues! But it came with a head office email address – so I’ll be exploring those issues later… but not until I have some sort of opening structure for the new book (it doesn’t help that I have at least four part finished projects going at once, some ideas overlapping…)

More Admission Procedures: Crossing Over that Psychological Line

You know - I’ve always been a fan of the artist known as ‘Barb’, except her work tends to be F/m and the subject of the disciplinarian’s righteous zeal and is often worryingly youthful in appearance.  But not ALL her work has been F/m by any stretch of the imagination, the imaginative forms of humiliation she has dreamed up and the manner in which she is able to portray the effect all this has on her unlucky subjects is second to none, in my humble opinion - and her portrayals of stern-faced nurses in those traditional uniform dresses and aprons we all love to see are just to good to be ignored, even if the theme is not always my ‘thing’. 

So here is something that IS up my tree, a sort of ‘mash-up’ of two Barb’s stitched together, with a couple of alterations and a few additions from various other sources have been thrown in for good measure.  Those of you familiar with Barb’s work will undoubtedly recognize the two main drawings which have been used and even those of you NOT so familiar, will I’m sure, have come across one or the other while poking around. 

The storyline which instantly suggests itself could very much fit with the sentiment behind any number of works by yours truly, Garth Toyntanen (particularly one of the unfinished new ones), even in the absence of annotation – and sometimes that’s better, if it allows the imagination to fill in the gaps and thus tailor it to the individual’s tastes…but there you go!

PS: Did you see what I did there – the passive voice (‘…which have been used…’ or ‘…have been thrown in…’)?  Yep – a throwback to my science days I’m afraid.  In science writing (in papers intended for peer-reviewed journals) you never DO anything yourself - oh no!.  It just sort of happens, just takes takes place: “Calcium carbonate was added to copper sulphate and a colour change was observed…”

PPS:  Still no news form the folk behind the gym instructor / personal trainer course I attended through much of autumn as to whether there is a problem with my written coursework or not. So as of this moment in time I still don’t know if I’m through the latter part of it (personal trainer) and thus I cannot yet apply for inclusion on the Register of Exercise Professionals.  Because of that I cannot take on any clients at present, which I’d have liked to have done ASAP post course while, not only was it all still fresh in my mind (the stretches and things I wouldn’t ordinarily use myself as part of my program), but my confidence as regards the teaching aspect was still high.  I’d like to celebrate – but right now I don’t feel confident I necessarily have anything to celebrate!  

Now I'm off to the gym...bye...           

The Perfect Domineering School Matron - Some Thoughts From A New Blog Worthy of Exploration

Hi, again folks!  I trust you’re all sitting comfortably – yes?  Then, I’ll begin.  And it’s difficult to know WHERE to start – so much has happened recently… Err… No it hasn’t!  Not really.  Same old grind: gym session in the morning for cardio / fat burning and weights in gym in the evening for strength and muscular hypertrophy (some hope!); and in between, a little writing, sitting in a nearby coffee bar or pub (but on coffee only!).  But at least now that the gym instructor / personal trainer (PT) course has ended it is only two or three times per week, freeing up more time to get back to some more serious writing (I can’t deal with all those short stops and starts) and all those unfinished projects, photo manipulations and artwork.  

Talking of which (artwork - if you can call it that): I threw together a corporal punishment enforced punitive exercise and disciplne style photo manip based on that 'plank' core exercise photo I posted last time.  The best place to see it is probably on my Pineterest account (click right here - on this spot - to view) although it is also available on my Tumblr account (please follow, if you don't already!). 

Going back to the gym course: I only wish I had the results from the written assignment / case study so that I knew whether or not I am officially qualified as a PT and can start to look for a few clients to begin earning a little money (and indulge myself in a little – modest; very – celebration of some sort).  You’ll be the first to know when the result comes through (ok; second to know – Twitter will get it first… err…Would you believe third to know?  My mum’ll get the nod first – unless she’s on the phone!).  It’ll be annoying if I DO end up having to re-do the written course work coz I only dropped six questions in four exams – and one of those was because I somehow neglected to enter it on the answer sheet, and another was because I’d miss-read the bloody question!  What a wan*%$*….beeeep…!!!!

Meanwhile – now I have a little free time – I came across a new (ish – new to me anyway) blog by QBuzz.  Now he has had a blog listed here before, but one which is now deceased it seems (I MUST remember to remove it).  His new version is called ‘Spanking, cuckoldand bi’(click to visit – or see entry in right hand sidebar blog list) – which I know is not everyone who visits here’s proverbial cup of tea but the F/M side of it will float some people’s boat (not mine particularly, but hey!) and there is a substantial amount of F/F content too.  I can’t quite remember what search terms I was using when I came across it (it was Friday just gone and I was in a rush / panic) but some of his manipulated drawings came up featuring the strict, domineering school or hospital matron handing out a caning or spanking – which is of course one of my fave themes, albeit in control of young ladies - (see above and below) along with the following text:      

………………………………………………

 The perfect School Matron (by QBuzz)

A school matron might be the only woman on the staff of a posh finishing school, but no doubt the pupils fear her more than all but the most severe masters. You only have to think of breaking one of her myriad and ever-changing rules and you'll find yourself over her knee, getting a taste of her hairbrush on your bare bottom. And if she feels you aren't properly penitent (or she just fancies a good show in the afternoon) she'll march you down to the headmaster for six of the best on the spot.

The perfect school matron is probably a stout lady from the north of England, dressed in the traditional navy blue garb with timepiece clipped to her breast so she can see when all those naughty boys are late. It would delight her to be able to discipline the sons of stuck-up bankers, doctors and accountants, most of them from ‘down south’ where as far as she is concerned everyone runs riot in an orgy of indiscipline.

Imagine the scenes in a dormitory run by such a creature. Every evening a line of boys stand quaking outside Matron's room, listening to the squeals of the boy before them - usually Henry Hancock - as she spanks his bare bottom bright purple. Matron really has it in for young Henry this term. Has he been breaking her new 'no home comforts' rule? Has the headmaster had a quiet work identifying him as 'one to keep an eye on'? It wouldn't have anything to do with the fact that Henry is a grammar school boy on a scholarship would it? And as for you... You and your friends  weren't in your pyjamas by 8pm sharp?

Now you'll be supplying Matron's entertainment for the evening, rotating between corner time and squirming across her stockinged lap for the next 3 hours. And even the teachers aren't exempt: 'Think you’re too big for punishment eh? Sneaking out with Mr Winders to the pub after lights out! I don’t care if you’re both old enough to drink, in my book that’s grounds for a leathering any day! And I’ll be having a quiet word with Mr Winders when I’m done with you two!'

Once you've left school, there's still no escaping those merciless matrons. You'll no doubt be in hospital at some point, where you'll find that once again it's the hairbrush-wielding harridan who runs the show. Perhaps your wife will hire your old school matron to keep you and your sons in line during the summer holidays?

And if you're unlucky enough to find yourself in prison, there'll no doubt be a prison matron to carry out all sorts of humiliating and intimate examinations. Though you'll probably be more worried about the 'intimate examinations' your cellmates are carrying out on you by that point!

What I've Discovered, What I've Been Up To - And Where I've Been!

So… you might have been wondering where I’ve been, since my posts have dropped of so much of late. Well I’ve been involved in taking a gym instructor / personal trainer course. I already hold a M.Sc in human nutrition - and spend a large percentage of my time in the gym, when not writing or preparing photo manips / artworks / captions for my various blogs, website and other outlets - so it kind of made sense, especially since I make so little from the books and affiliate banners and so on. 

Well, I’m glad to be able to report I’ve now passed all exams as well as the two appraised practical teaching assessments, so assuming that my written coursework case study is accepted and doesn’t require any further work, I have now finished and as from tomorrow will be back working on various art / writing projects.

I’ll obviously be working as a personal trainer / nutritionist under my real name and so will be setting up a website and blogs specifically around that facet of my life and kept separate from this, but the thing about that particular career path that appeals IS the ability to choose how much or how little work to take on and to schedule it to allow the continuation of the type of thing I do here and also my writing (I have no less than three part-completed books / novels on my hard drives) while generating (I hope) sufficient income to support myself before my savings finally give out! 

If anyone wants to know more about this new aspect to my life, email me and I’ll pass on the details of my new blog, website etc as soon as as I create them, as for obvious reasons I don’t want to link directly from here or any other of my outlets dedicated to my writing etc. So, to reiterate: I WILL be resuming updating this and my other sites, such as my Pinterest, Blogger and Deviant Art accounts on a regular to semi-regular basis from today onwards.

Many thanks for your patience in continuing to follow me while I've been out of the loop...  But look what I found (see top of this article) on Youtube in the meantime, when I took a break between finishing the level two gym instructor course and beginning the level three personal trainer course, and an old mate stood me a few pints down the pub to celebrate passing that first gym instructor part...and getting 100% in one of the two exam papers!!! (I got 92% in the other... Ok, Ok... I dropped six questions in four papers... But now I'm showing off!).

So how much like one of my plots is that vid, especially the opening moments???  It dates to 2002 apparently, so I can't claim any influence - nor has it influenced me, since I've literally only just come across it.  Ladytron seem to have a knack for writing the sort of kinkily suggestive lyrics that seem to gel with me and my writing - another of their tracks is called 'My Little Runnaway' and is sung in the sort of breathless manner which could imply almost anything one's imagination might dredge up; if that makes sense.  Google it and see / listen (the vid itself doesn't seem to say much - it's all in the lyrics and delivery!).

 

Now here's an example of how inspiration can arise from the oddest sources (immediately above).  This is an image from some of the course teaching material.  What it actually portrays is how NOT to perform an exercise known as 'The Plank' (a well-known technique for strengthening the so-called core muscles).  All VERY innocent and above board.  But just one glance was enough to get my blood all heated.  

That downward curve in the small of the back (lordosis, technically) and the rearward tilt of the pelvis and upward tilt of the bottom it produces may be contra-indicated for the exercise, but what a perfect disciplinary pose for a slow, systematic and long drawn-out thrashing of her backside, the bottom raised and perfectly presented to the cane or riding crop, especially if the intention is to land the majority of the strikes along that tender junction between her thighs and buttocks and the underside of her bottom, arcing the cane along the sweep of her thighs and then up and under.

Of course she's over dressed in THIS depiction.  I would imagine ultra-thin drum-tight satiny gym shorts or a skin-tight leotard, high-cut so that the majority of her bottom is left bare and defenseless with just the narrowest of gussets, little more than a tight strip of glossy fabric that all but disappears between a pair of nicely separated bottom cheeks.  

The wickedly pliant cane or switch will whistle through the air once every ten seconds for one minute - six strikes in all - then two minutes to recover, still holding the posture, then another six kisses of rattan, bamboo or plaited leather, followed by a further two minutes recovery before a final six strikes are awarded, giving eighteen strokes in all spread over seven to eight minutes, with the slightest loss of composure or posture rewarded by a repeat of the operation the following day.   

A floor-standing mirror will have been set up beforehand or the position taken up before a mirrored wall of the type encountered in a dance studio and the girl obliged to observe herself throughout as her features become more and more distorted by pain and anguish, with suitable penalties in place for closing her eyes or looking away. 

This latter approach is a 'must' if the experience is to become sufficiently deeply ingrained in her memory and psyche and is something which can be reinforced further later on during a one-to-one counseling or psychotherapy session during which she can be made to recall and recount how she felt under discipline, how the recollection makes her feel about herself, how she feels this treatment is changing her and the way she feels about exercise in general and her ambition in general.  All this may then be further backed up by way of her being obliged to write a reflective report or self-critical essay.